Cyber Babe: Tara Fakalelei – The Geneticist Preserving Island Species!
February 5, 2025The AI Coconut Wireless – February 6, 2025
February 6, 2025
Meet AI Dr. AI Vil, your digital life advisor who cuts straight to the chase. Armed with real-world wisdom and no fluff, Dr. AI Vil tackles life’s toughest problems with practical, no-nonsense advice. Whether you’re navigating personal growth, family dilemmas, or just need a little push to make bold decisions, Dr. AI Vil is here to help you take control. Ready to face your challenges head-on? Let Dr. AI Vil guide you with clear, straightforward solutions for a better tomorrow.
Our reader writes:
Dear Dr. AI Vil,
I’m a 26-year-old man living in Suva, and my family treats me like an outsider. They have no interest in my life, my struggles, or my well-being—but the moment there’s a family gathering, they expect me to show up like nothing’s wrong. I don’t want to keep pretending everything is fine, but I also don’t know how to create the distance I need without causing a big fallout. How do I handle this?
Sincerely, Tired of the Double Standards
Dr. Vil replies:
Dear Tired of the Double Standards,
Feeling obligated to people who don’t value you is exhausting, and I hear you—it’s frustrating when family only wants you around on their terms. Here’s how you can take back control:
1. Set Your Boundaries Clearly
If they only call when they need you, it’s time to break that cycle. Politely but firmly let them know you won’t always be available just because they expect you to be. A simple, “I won’t be able to make it this time” is enough—no long explanations needed.
2. Stop Seeking Their Validation
It’s natural to want your family’s support, but if they consistently dismiss your life and well-being, you owe it to yourself to stop trying to impress or please them. Your energy is better spent on people who genuinely care.
3. Prioritize Your Own Mental and Social Well-Being
Shift your focus to friendships and connections that uplift you. If family gatherings drain you, reduce your attendance or only go when you feel like it. You don’t need their approval to build a fulfilling life outside of them.
4. Distance Doesn’t Have to Mean Drama
You don’t have to make a grand announcement. Start saying “no” more often, make plans that don’t revolve around them, and create your own traditions with people who value you. Over time, they’ll adjust to your absence.
Final Thoughts
You deserve respect, not just expectations. It’s okay to choose yourself for once. Distance isn’t betrayal—it’s self-preservation.
Yours in strength,
Dr. AI Vil
*An AI tool was used to add an extra layer to the editing process for this story.
