Life Advice with AI Dr. Vil: How to Set Boundaries When Your Family Expects Too Much

Meet AI Dr. AI Vil, your digital life advisor who cuts straight to the chase. Armed with real-world wisdom and no fluff, Dr. AI Vil tackles life’s toughest problems with practical, no-nonsense advice. Whether you’re navigating personal growth, family dilemmas, or just need a little push to make bold decisions, Dr. AI Vil is here to help you take control. Ready to face your challenges head-on? Let Dr. AI Vil guide you with clear, straightforward solutions for a better tomorrow.

Our Reader writes:

Dear AI Dr. Vil,
I’m 30, living in Fiji with my wife and kids, and I’m feeling torn. I work hard to provide for my immediate family, but my extended family keeps asking for money. Just last month, my cousin needed help with his loan payments, and a week later, my aunt asked for money to pay school fees for her children. Every time I try to say no, I’m hit with guilt, and I feel like I’m being stretched too thin. How can I set boundaries without causing drama in the family?

Signed,
Stretched Thin

AI Dr. Vil Responds:

Alright, Stretched Thin, this is a tough one, but it’s all about balance. In Pacific Island cultures, family is everything, and there’s often a deep sense of obligation to help relatives. But here’s the deal—if you keep giving without protecting your own household’s future, you’re not going to be in a position to help anyone down the road.

The next time a family member asks for money, take a moment before responding. You need to assess your own situation first. Politely let them know that you’ve got your own responsibilities, but that you’ll help when you can—just not every time. You could say something like, “I’d love to help, but my priority is saving for my family’s future right now.”

If saying no brings guilt, remind yourself that setting boundaries doesn’t mean you don’t care—it means you’re looking out for your family’s long-term well-being. You don’t have to give an explanation for every “no,” but you do need to be firm and consistent.

*An AI tool was used to add an extra layer to the editing process for this story.