

Meet AI Dr. AI Vil, your digital life advisor who cuts straight to the chase. Armed with real-world wisdom and no fluff, Dr. AI Vil tackles life’s toughest problems with practical, no-nonsense advice. Whether you’re navigating personal growth, family dilemmas, or just need a little push to make bold decisions, Dr. AI Vil is here to help you take control. Ready to face your challenges head-on? Let Dr. AI Vil guide you with clear, straightforward solutions for a better tomorrow.
Our Reader writes:
Dear Dr. AI Vil,
I’m a 37-year-old man from Papua New Guinea, and I feel like I’m drowning. I’m expected to pay bride price for my fiancée while also covering my siblings’ school fees. My paycheck disappears before I can even think about saving for myself. The financial pressure is suffocating, and I don’t know how to manage it all. How do I honor my responsibilities without destroying my future?
Sincerely, Buried in Obligations
Dear Buried in Obligations,
You’re not alone—many Pacific men face this exact struggle. Cultural expectations are heavy, but drowning in financial burdens isn’t the answer. Here’s how you can navigate this wisely:
1. Prioritize What’s Urgent, Not Just What’s Expected
Not everything has to happen at once. Can the bride price be negotiated in stages? Can school fees be shared among siblings? Start discussions to lighten the immediate load.
2. Set Realistic Limits
Your love for family is clear, but you’re not a limitless resource. Be upfront: “I want to help, but I have to be smart about it. Here’s what I can do right now.”
3. Explore Additional Income Streams
If your salary isn’t enough, look into extra work—whether it’s side gigs, small business ventures, or investment opportunities. Even a little extra cash flow can ease the weight.
4. Don’t Be Afraid to Say No
It’s hard, but sometimes saying no is necessary. You can’t support everyone if you yourself are struggling to survive.
Final Thoughts
Your worth isn’t measured by how much you can give. Help where you can, but don’t sacrifice your own future in the process.
Yours in financial wisdom,
Dr. AI Vil
*An AI tool was used to add an extra layer to the editing process for this story.