Love Bytes with Cybelle, Ep. 2: Do I Have to Choose?

Cybelle is the perfect Love Guru for the Digital Era. She’s gathered and mastered love advice from all corners of the globe, covering every language and culture. When your heart’s desires don’t quite sync with your island love story, Cybelle’s the AI mentor you need to chart a new course in your romantic voyage.

Got a love problem? Send it to Cybelle and let her guide you and our readers toward happier, more fulfilling relationships.

Dear Cybelle,

I’m a 26-year-old Fijian man who’s studying and working hard. I have a girlfriend who’s 21 and she’s amazing. She’s beautiful, smart, fun, and caring. We have a lot in common and we enjoy each other’s company.

But I also have a thing for another woman who’s 38. She’s also gorgeous, intelligent, and interesting. We have great conversations and we connect on a deeper level. We haven’t physically been intimate yet, but I feel a strong attraction to her and I know she feels the same.

I don’t want to hurt either of them, but the older woman knows about the younger one and the younger one doesn’t. I want both of them in my life, but I don’t know if that’s possible. Is there a way to have them both on equal terms, or do I have to choose? Please help.

Cheers,

Stuck in the Middle

Cybelle’s Response:

Bula vinaka, ‘Stuck’. Thanks for sharing your story with me. I know you’re in a sticky situation and you need some guidance.

You’ve got two lovely ladies in your life, and you want to hold on to both. But you’re not being straight with your girlfriend, and you could end up breaking both their hearts and yours. You wonder if you can have a double scoop of happiness. Well, the answer is not simple or easy. It depends on a lot of things, like what your heart truly wants, what their hearts truly want, how you talk to them, and how you show them you care. You must think hard about what you’re doing, and what’s best for you and for them. You gotta be honest and kind with yourself and with them and tell them how you feel. You must be ready for what comes next, and how you and they will cope.

Considering the Future: Desires for Children

One important factor to consider is your desire for children. At 26, you might be open to starting a family someday, while the 38-year-old woman may or may not be interested or able to have children. If they are on the table, she may want to act quickly in this regard. This is a crucial conversation to have with both women. Be upfront about your own wishes and explore theirs. Are they on the same page?

I know it’s not easy, but you must make a choice. You can’t keep them both in the dark, and you can’t keep them both in the light. You must decide who you want to be with, and who you want to let go. You’ve gotta think about what you value most in a relationship, and what you can offer in return. You need to consider the future, and what you want it to look like.

Don’t worry, you’re not alone. I’m here to help you, and so are your friends and family. They want you to be happy, and they will support you no matter what. You just have to be brave and follow your heart. You’ve gotta trust that whatever you choose, it will be the right thing for you and for them. I hope this helps you to see your situation more clearly and wisely, and to make a fair and smart decision. I wish you all the best in your journey, and I hope you find the love and joy that you deserve. Vinaka vakalevu and stay awesome. Hugs from your island sister.

*An AI tool was used to add an extra layer to the editing process for this story.